Last week I shared about Jackson going to school and though I knew he was ready, I was not. I also indicated that parenting is tough because it changes every day. None of that is untrue. What I failed to mention is that all the moments are special and unique. Though I grieve the loss of what my children were, what is new is better. I just get nostalgic sometimes…that’s all. It is it’s newness that makes it so fun.
Another “i have never done that before” came on Saturday. We were in San Diego visiting family and in the middle of the day our youngest, Charlotte, had to take a nap. I had two choices. I could either put here in a pack and play. Or I could take the moment and make a memory. I think I chose correctly. Charlotte napped on me. In her nineteen months of life on this earth, I believe it is the first time she has done this. I mean I have had baby snoozes, but never a full blown nap. Typically I am too busy, or gone, or wanting to get things done while she sleeps.
I should have done this a long time ago.
Shara was kind enough to capture the moment. I didn’t ask her to, but as a photographer, she lives her life looking to gather thoughts, feelings, and emotions in picture form.
I have never experienced anything as difficult and rewarding as parenting. I think neither of those are mutually exclusive. The reward comes from amount of effort put in.
My life is often out of balance and a few months ago I shared about how I was desperately trying to find that balance. The lives of the three children I have been entrusted with are one of the many reasons I desire balance. I want to be a great youth pastor. I want to be an excellent friend. The list goes on of the things and titles I aspire to. However I am their dad and the only one they have. So I pray that they see the other parts of me (pastor, friend, body builder) as extensions of a greater calling to them. I pray they are able to live in conjunction with each other. I pray that they grow up thinking I have the best job in the world, and more importantly that they grow up loving the God I serve.
May my life and my works be an outpouring of my devotion to God and to the people I am called to serve.